Avengers - Worth it!

Avengers Assemble... for the win!

You have seen all the hype. A few years worth…from the ending of Iron Man and the second (better) Hulk and you’re wondering if it’s worth it. Well… HELL YEAH! The Avengers is an awesome movie. It has been building for quite some time. I liked Hulk, Loved both Iron Man movies, Thought Thor was ok, and liked Captain America…. all stepping stone to the big dance.

Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) and the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) steal the show. Captain America (Chris Evans), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) take on Loki (Tom Hiddleston) Norse god of Mischief and his army of alien invaders. Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) pulls the team together to defend the world from its impending doom.

The Avengers are rough at first, not getting along, but eventually they find a common cause and kick some major butt! The action is intense, the scenery is wonderful, and the story line is good. It does drag slightly in some places but it isn’t bad enough to notice. The computer graphics and humor are epic and something worth seeing.

My inner comic book geek places this movie about the Xmen. The movie does count on you to have seen the other individual ones to get the backgrounds, but other than that there are no noticeable flaws in the movie.

Put this on the: “to Watch” list. If you are a true Avengers comic book fan… wait until the very end… you won’t regret it! 

Cabin in the Woods… or Lame in the Theater… you decide

Dana (Kristen Connolly) the virgin, Curt (Chris Hemsworth) the athlete, Jules (Anna Hitchison) the whore, Marty (Fran Kranz) the fool, and  Holden (Jesse Williams) the scholar all head out into the boonies for a weekend of fun and fornication, but it turns out they are pawns in a much bigger scheme. I wish I was making this up.

This movie rips off so many other movies it’s not funny. It has a Deliverance weirdo at the gas station, Evil Dead’s cabin with creepy cellar, Hellraiser like puzzle, and The Ring ghost in other scenes. The plot of the movie is that the “Ancient Ones” are sealed beneath the earth (like Wrath of the Titans) and to be placated, a sacrifice must be made each time. The victims must suffer then die, and the Ancient Ones will stay underground. 

So this government group ensures that a very elaborate and painful death await the victims. Then they force the kids into the behavior they need for the sacrifice to work in a large Hollywood studio like military complex.

The hero of the movie for me was Marty, the dope smoking conspiracy theorist. If not for his enjoyable rants and acting (similar to Shaggy on Scooby doo) I would be adamantly against anyone going to see this movie. It’s definitely a rental view. Don’t waste your money on a theater ticket for this one.  

There’s just too many stupid things that make this movie less entertaining and more annoying. 

American Pie Reunion ~ same ol’ stuff

One of the complaints about movies now-a-days is that “there are no NEW ideas.” Remakes of old TV shows and sequels ten years after are everywhere. Hollywood is hoping to get one more drink of that money trough. In short, they’re counting on you to feel nostalgic.

American Pie Reunion is no different. I mean that literally. It’s the same movie basically as all the rest. The plot is the same, the actors have returned, and they still have pretty much the same hang ups except their lives did not turn out the way they planned (kinda like ours).  Jim is the sexually awkward man, now married to Michelle with a kid. Kevin is still a little obsessed with his first love, Vicky. Oz is still a buff jock hung up on love lost, Finch is still enigmatic, and Stifler is still a dick.

You already know the plot. There’s an embarrassing sexual encounter with Jim who will obviously be caught by the public. Stifler will screw with people. Finch will pretend to be cooler than he really is, Oz will fawn over Heather and try to win her back. Then there is the awkward and funny moments between Jim and his dad.

In short, if you liked the American Pie movies, you’ll like this one. It’s funny, the same theme, the same show, just 13 years later. Even the Sherminator, Shifler’s mom, and Milf-brothers have returned. It’s a good movie if you’re a fan, but a slow decay of our standards as Hollywood repackages the old into new. 

Wrath of the Titans ~ David and Goliath on Steroids

Man no longer prays to the Gods. Their time is coming to an end. What man doesn’t realize is that the power of the Gods has been keeping Kronos trapped within the Earth. As the Gods weaken, their prison for Titans also weakens. Where are they going to go? Oops.

Perseus (Sam Worthington) doesn’t want any part of it. He’s done doing the bidding of gods like his father Zeus (Liam Neeson), his half-brother Ares (Edgar Ramirez), and Uncle Hades (Ralph Fiennes). He just wants to raise his son. Unfortunately the titans will be released upon the Earth and Kronos will destroy everything. Perseus has to break out the gear and start being a hero again.

I’m a little rusty on my Greek mythology, but the movie helps you figure out what you need to know to get the gist of the movie. I’m not quite sold on Worthington as a good actor yet, but he’s growing on me. I can’t complain about Liam Neeson at all. I did not get to see the first movie as of yet (Clash of the Titans) but I am familiar with the version from the 80’s which has always been a favorite of mine.  The animation is good. You do not have a problem with the blending of CG and human actors. The Story line is a bit far-fetched but we are talking about gods, titans, and cyclops, oh my.

Whenever there is a movie with small things in the same scene with big this, it always seems to get a little hard to follow the action. Make the action fast, and it’s REALLY hard. There are parts like that in Wrath. The scene is happening so fast you don’t realize what you’re seeing until it’s done, but it is not enough to make you give up on the movie.

Not many people liked the first one, and I’d suggest not letting that limit your options to see this one. I saw it in 3D and it really didn’t need to be. If you don’t have a movie you’ll holding out for, you might want to consider it, but definitely see the rental.  

Watch for the brief return of an old friend from the 80’s movie. I won’t tell you who. (I said tell.)  

Silent House ~ just like the theater.... ZZZzzzzz...

Elizabeth Olsen is breaking into the movie industry. I imagine all stars have a bumpy time at first, and she’s no different. In Silent House, she plays Sarah, an odd young woman who seems to be at odds with something. Problem is the movie never explains it. In a nutshell, this movie sucked. The director tried to be unique with a chasing camera, unfocused kind of thing. At time I swear I thought Sarah was going to smash her face into the camera because it was following too close. It’s hard to watch when the cameraman runs to get in front of a running actor and it appears he drops the camera. It’s OK if you’re watching a show like COPS, but in a motion picture, not so much.

Adam Trese plays John, her dad, and Eric Sheffer Stevens, play Peter, her uncle. Strange things start to happen to Sarah when she becomes trapped in her childhood home….um…ok.. That’s what the trailer says. Look away if you plan on seeing the movie. 

Girl flips out and kills her father and uncle in her neglected childhood home because they molested her as a child. The movie tries to make you believe someone has broken into the house and attacked them, but it fails miserably. Sarah interacts with another woman that later turns out to be herself but in a clumsy way. There's a big goon who walks around in camouflage dragging bodies that also turns out to be Sarah. 

Ok… those who want to see the movie can come back, if there are any. Olsen plays the part of a scared woman very convincingly. I imagine its natural growing up with her sisters. The movie just didn’t make any sense.  I wouldn’t even bother renting it. Bad camera shots, jittery filming, purposely unfocused scenes, and a story that doesn't mean a damn thing. I'm not a fan of "quirky" but maybe you are.

Hopefully Olsen’s streak of quirky want to be movies will end and she can get her career going.  

21 Jump Street ~ Hillarious, go see it!

Funny, funny, funny! I’m not kidding. I laughed (as well as everyone in the theater) nearly all 109 minutes. Seriously! Jonah Hill (Schmidt) and Channing Tatum (Jenko) are two underachievers.  Schmidt is smart but not physically up to the task, and Jenko is all muscle and little brain. They become friends in the police academy to pass. Life as policemen isn’t as fantastic as they hoped and when their big chance to make a bust happens…. They blow it.

Off to Jump Street which is run by Ice Cube (Captain Dickson) who does not hide his true feelings. Their job is to infiltrate a high school, befriend the drug dealers, find the source of a new drug ready to become viral, and bring it down. The boys are up to the task….well…  The roles get reversed. The high school jock, Jenko, finds himself in a world he cannot understand as the geeks are now the cool click in school. Everyone actually studies, cares about the environment and feelings. Schmidt finds himself one of the coolest kids in school, even though he’s forced to move back in with his parents.

I absolutely loved this movie. I caught glimpses of the TV series growing up, but not enough to to determine if it’s a good reference. There is a nice surprise for fans of the TV show….. aw hell… It’ll be news soon enough. Johnny Depp and Peter Deluise make a cameo. Shhh… don’t tell everyone. 

I find myself in the strange position of trying NOT to tell people about the movie because I want them to go see it so I can see if they laugh as much as I did. So go see it…. And come back ant tell me! 

John Carter ~ Avatar who?

John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) is a Civil War cavalry soldier who is still at war with himself, authority, and just about anyone else around him. He gets transported to Mars. The gravity on Mars is substantially less than Earth, so John Carter is 10 time stronger than the regular inhabitants. He's faster, stronger, more agile, regular Superman without the tights. As he tries to come to terms with his new environment, his sense of honor drives him to do what most honorable men do, defend the helpless.

Powers beyond comprehension are moving to continue Mars down it’s path of destruction and eventually as gets explained, destroy Earth. John Carter becomes the road block. He saves the princess of Helium, Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins) and with the help of Sola (Samantha Morton, the daughter of the  Mars warrior creature chief Tar Traks (Willem Dafoe), he turns the tide against the evil forces.

First off, this movie was phenomenal. The computer graphics are stunning. I was blown away. Avatar move over… there’s a new king in town. This movie is based on a comic book in which a human rises to become a warlord on Mars. This movie is a winner. As with most science fiction, there are language barriers and terms unfamiliar to the audience that we need to get over, but the movie does it rather well. Remember how in Harry Potter they said "muggle" and at first no one knew what a muggle was? That kind of thing.

The hero is good looking. The princess is sexy and strong. The CG is captivating and the creatures are flawless from the fur on the giant white gorilla monsters, to the lovable facial expressions of  Woola, Carter’s dinosaur-like dog. The flying ships, the planet, the detail of the landscape blows Avatar away. I know there’s some hard core Avatarians out there who won’t stand for it. If you’re going to see this in the theater… pay a little extra to see the 3D. The mesh of CG and human actor is superb.

Disney knocks it out of the park on this one.